The Verizon Headache: Strike and Sabotage

10 Aug
  • Verizon workers are angry.
    • At Verizon.
  • 45,000 of its workers have been on strike for several days.
  • Now there are reports of fiber optic lines being slashed by what are likely a few rogue asses.
  • Fiber optic lines carry cable, internet and phone service.
  • Sure there are cell phones, but what if you really really really need to call 911 from a land line that’s been destroyed?
  • In one incident, phone service to a police department in NJ was interrupted.
  • Messing with public safety because, like a small, pooping child, you have no control of your emotions is not very cool.

Not pretty. Not very cool.

The Problem With a Firework Alarm Clock

9 Aug
  • A woman in Gainesville, FL got drunk last Sunday.
    • With her boyfriend.
  • Her boyfriend fell asleep.
  • She wanted to wake him.
    • And figured some leftover fireworks from the 4th of July would do the trick.
      • You know, the classic firework alarm clock.
  • So she lit one.
  • It exploded.
  • Her boyfriend woke up.
  • Mission accomplished.
    • At least until she realized she blew off her thumb, middle and ring fingers.
  • Need we explain why this is not very cool?
    • No.

Firework alarm clock? Not very cool.

The iPhone Hand Case

8 Aug
  • This one is very, very not very cool.
    • And very creepy.
  • iPhones are all the rage.
  • Lots of companies make cases for them.
    • Many of which are cool.
    • Some of which are absolutely not cool.
  • The image below is not Photoshopped.
  • It displays a girl talking on her iPhone sporting the “Hand Case.” 
    • It’s a real product manufactured by a real Japanese company called Dokkiri.
  • Holding hands with your iPhone is not very cool.

Holding hands with your iPhone is not very cool.

The Nicki Minaj Nipple Incident

5 Aug
  • Nicki Minaj performed on Good Morning America today.
  • A lot of bouncing was involved.
    • Enough to shake a nipple free of its coverings.
  • ABC aired the live performance with a five second delay.
    • But it wasn’t enough time to censor the entire incident.
  • A big network losing control of a small nipple is not very cool.

Damn you, slippery nipple.

The Dead Massachusetts Swimmer

1 Jul
  • This is disgusting.
  • A woman’s body was discovered floating in a public pool in Massachusetts yesterday.
  • Dead.
  • With nary a swimmer, lifeguard or health inspector noticing it.
  • For two days.
  • During which the pool was open.
  • Is that very cool?
  • No.  
  • No way.
  • Not very cool wins this one.

The Biker and the Bike Lane

29 Jun
  • A biker in NYC was recently fined by NYPD for not riding in the designated bike lane.
  • $50.
  • On the infraction severity scale, this ranks a -1.
  • Not very cool to fine a rider for this.
  • Especially when bike lanes are frequently blocked by vehicles and there’s no other option.
  • Check out the biker’s hilariously sarcastic video response to the NYPD below.

The Perils of Inspecting a Gas Truck With a Lighter

23 Jun
  • Watch the video below.
  • A Shell gas truck pulls into a gas station to deliver fuel.
  • The gas station attendant can be seen inspecting the 5,000 gallon tank through the port holes on top.
  • But it looks like he has trouble seeing into one of the port holes in the dark.
  • So he decides to use a lighter to help.
  • A lighter.
  • Anyone see a potential problem here?
  • What happens next is not very cool.
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